Which part of you listens?
The way you listen to others has an impact on them & your relationship—both in your personal and professional team.
It either encourages deeper connection, empowerment, and positive energy or – in the case when we don’t listen very well to others, may increase anxiety, fatigue, or disconnection with others.
“Just an improved ability to listen can result in employees experiencing less fatigue, anxiety, and depression. That is powerful, both for the individuals and the company as a whole. Better-performing employees support greater team cohesion and higher productivity in getting projects over the goal line, which ultimately increases business results.” (Echo, Listening Intelligence – Combining Active Listening and Cognitive Diversity to Elevate Team Performance)
Today my invitation is for all of us to notice whenever we “hear” the other but we are not really listening.
? Pause anytime we notice that our own internal voice is busy judging, arguing, or defending ourselves as the other speaks, and it makes it impossible to be really present with the other and their experience.
? So what happens next if we DON’T pause and notice our inner judge and protector took over? Let’s say someone is sharing something unpleasant about us – we go straight into defense mode. We feel judged, and we judge back and even fight back. “No room for empathy; this is war!” shouts the inner judge. No wonder we often misunderstand each other, as we really cannot hear at that moment, with our inner judge ‘shouting’ at us and the other.
? What can happen when we actually DO PAUSE? And take a deep breath and even ask the other to give us a moment to recenter anytime we notice we don’t really listen to the other?
? We can switch from the human-animal part of our brain to our human spirit brain. Our “human animal” part of us is driven by instincts and survival fight/flight/freeze/flee reactions in some tense communications.
? The “human spirit” part of us has access to empathy, love, compassion, creativity, innovative solutions, and higher-level thinking.
? Notice today in your conversations which part of you is listening.
Judgments coming up for you, and negative feelings? That might be a sign that the “human animal” part of the brain (amygdala) that cares for survival but not as much about our happiness or the quality of our relationships is in charge of your communication at that moment. Feeling good and connected with the other? Yay! Your human spirit might be doing the talking and listening 🙂
? Wishing you a day filled with communications that nourish your spirit, cheer your heart and bring more ease and flow to your projects.
Lucie
Check out the original post on LinkedIn
