Sometimes what makes us successful is the very cause of our misery. Our brain is a powerful instrument, a powerful weapon. A double-edged sword. Yield it correctly, and it will cut through the most complex problems. Use it carelessly, and it will spiral out of control, and it will lead to overthinking.

I invite you to take a few moments and think about your experience as an IT leader?

What is it that you truly desire?

• Less trouble?
• More authority?
• More resources?
• Friendlier peers?
• Supportive CFO? 
• All of the above?

IT people are caring, honest, and rational beings. We’re at our best when we’re happy. We get creative through encouragement. We need focus to solve complex problems. The focus needs a quiet space, within and outside. So we avoid conflicts and cherish peace. 

Although we seek peace, our daily lives are anything but that. We get frustrated when non-IT people don’t get us. We feel victimized when CFO makes IT decisions without involving us. We get upset when our peers go behind our backs and talk to the board. We get angry when business units create their own shadow iT and undermine our authority. This creates tension. The tension is caused by negative emotions. And so, we find emotions counterproductive and upsetting. How can we be creative when upset? This makes us unhappy.

What do we want?

So I’m asking again: What do we want? 

Happiness! 

When do we want iT?

Now!

Do we have iT? 

No! 

Who’s taking iT from us? 

Others! (not true)

How do we get iT back? 

We are problem solvers. We see the source of all of our unhappiness in others. We want to fix iT. And so our genius brains create a fix-it algorithm like this:

If we give others what they want, how they want it, and when they want it, then and only then they’ll be happy. Once happy, they won’t get angry at us. When not angry, they won’t attack us. When not under attack, we can stay happy. 

Let me translate: we must create perfect solutions. We must have a ZERO bug policy. We must test, test, test, and test and test again. We must have no delayed deliveries. We should have plan B for plan A, plan C for plan B, plan D for plan C, and so on. We must not forget anything. Perfect solution! Brilliant! is iT?

Isn’t iT a little bit overwhelming?

You know iT, and I know iT that is not sustainable. How? We’ve been doing this for years, and it has never worked 100%. 

We have this desire to make things perfect. This is not a bad thing. This is an incredible superpower that we are blessed with. However, when we overuse this power, it becomes a curse. It starts to work against us.

In pursuit of pleasing others, we’ve made a mess out of ourselves. 

We’ve become overthinkers. 

Research shows that overthinking will lead to worrying. Worrying generates anxiety. Staying anxious for a long period is very overwhelming. As a result, we won’t be able to stay focused and think clearly. We get stuck, and so we get frustrated. And we don’t like iT. So again, we use our tired rational minds to find a way out of this situation. And here we go again, overthinking everything. 

Have you seen a hamster running in circles on a wheel? I’m so sorry to say this: that hamster is us, and the wheel is our brain pattern of overthinking.

Isn’t good to be good?

Have you heard the expression: too much of a good thing is bad?

Caring for others and wanting them to feel happy is a good thing to do but not to the extend that it creates stress and anxiety for you.

Pleasing others is good but not when it undermines your authority as an IT leader. IT leadership is a balancing act. Balancing between your needs and the needs of others.

Happiness is not a business goal. It’s the foundation upon which personal and organizational goals can be realized. Your happiness is as important as the happiness of your team, peer, stakeholders and customers.

What’s the impact?

You wanted to create a peaceful environment to stay focused and do what you like most: creating excellent solutions. By overthinking stuff and pleasing others, you achieve quite the opposite of what you wanted.

How does it make you feel? Happy or angry?

If you keep overthinking stuff, you might succeed , but you will never become happy.

What can you do?

You have a strategic mind. Use iT!

If you just stop overthinking and thinking things over, you can find strategic ways to create a peaceful working environment for your team and yourself without trying to please others. There are specific strategies and techniques that will help IT leaders achieve that.

If you’re interested in learning and applying some of these techniques, connect with me over LinkedIn, and I’m gonna show you how to get off the hamster wheel and sustainably claim your happiness.

Are you overthinking iT?

Still not sure if you should connect with me?

What makes you overthink this? 

What if I can really help you?

What if you can help me help other IT leaders to get off the hamster wheel?

#itleadership #cio #mindfittery #mentalfitness #positiveintelligence